Ways to make a relationship better

Here are the best ways I have learned to make relationships better:

1. LISTEN

Sometimes this is very hard to do. Sometime we are in our heads holding that one word someone else said that struck us about something that we did and now we are just waiting for them to stop talking so we can share that random thought linked to what they said. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY WERE SAYING??? I have had to learn to listen..I catch myself rambling in my mind all the time….and have to say STOP IT, LISTEN!!! Our minds work like lightening so to s -l-o-w d-o-w-n – i-s-h-a-r-d …but when we do we really hear peoples hearts, dreams, loves, needs, likes or dislikes…we find connection…listening spells L-O-V-E-D to the person who has just been HEARD!!!!

2. TALK

I know, I know I just said to listen but that was first!! Listen to others first then TALK :0) Share who you are with them. Share your feelings, thoughts, dreams, and fears. When we open up ourselves to people they open up to us. Building relationships on realness, not just surface weather, yeah i got kids, I attend church…but our LIVES …our struggles and strengths. I use to think that if shared my struggles I would LOOK weak and if I shared my strengths I would LOOK arrogant. Both are a bunch a junk ,wrapped in a bag of fear. SHARE YOU!!!

3. MAKE ALLOWANCES

Making allowances is about compassion and forgiveness. Its about compromise and letting go of control. Your way is not the only highway. We are all walking our own path and dealing with our own lives. In relationships sometimes you just have to walk along side even if you disagree because it is what the other person wants and needs. I like books, I could fill my house with them, my husband finds them to be clutter. So I have one shelf of them and many boxed up and a good many under a bench in my bedroom. He is ok with it. I use to fuss about it. I had 3 book cases and many many stacks here and there and everywhere.:0)  Find the middle of the bridge and agree. If it is really important walk along side just to share the view even if the view for my husband is a stinkin’ crappie fish!!

Advertisements

8 thoughts on “Ways to make a relationship better

  1. Great points Starla! I think listening is one of the biggest aspects of communication that’s ignored or discarded. Everyone has a point to make and no one wants to do their part and listen. So sad!

  2. Its so about compromise and listening. I could preach right on that! I know I’m getting over “its all about me.” I’m almost a year into marriage and sometimes I feel like I’m not getting it. Thank God for grace and patience with me.

  3. thanks kelly…it happens but hopefully if I have learned anything It is all about LISTENING on my part..:0) if others do that would be nice TOO!!

  4. I KNOW!!! yeah it is nice when we make it through the ME ME ME stage in marriage and learn that the other is SMART TOO!!! LOL

  5. Definitely about letting go of control and walking side by side. Relationships can be messy. In times of conflict and iron sharpening iron (smile), we must be willing to humble ourselves and allow God to show us truth in the situation….even when the truth hurts. (18 yrs of marriage and the truth still hurts!)

  6. we have made it 10 years and you are do right…sometimes the truth hurts but if you hear it WOW what a difference LISTENING makes :0)

  7. Pingback: Hearing what is being said! « Stars Rain

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s