The things we do…

Thursday (Book I'm Reading) THOUGHTS

Reading: Days of Deepening Friendship by Vinita Hampton Wright 

Her site and to buy this book : http://deepeningfriendship.loyolapress.com/

Hello I am Back…doing my Thursday Thoughts….I find it really interesting that the chapter I am choosing to do is RIGHT WHERE I AM!! I havent read ahead in this book I am just going along…I took a break and laid the book down and during that break I have been thinking about the very things Vinita addresses in this chapter.. God is good at that if we are listening…so lets get right to it shall we?? :0)

Chapter 19 : How do you get in your own way?

The first sentence or I should say clip of a sentence that stood out to me when reading this chapter is  –  Simple Self-Respect – When you break it down it really is SIMPLE…but we complicate things –don’t we??  (What If I say to so and so that they are walking on me they may stop talking to me all together ) We’re did we get the idea that keeping people who don’t care about us is a good thing???!!! Its simple – respect yourself. You are of worth!!

Vinita says we have to learn to understand what hurts us and what helps us. Something as simple as make up can make a big difference to two people as Vinita tells us. To one make up may give them too much attention and it becomes a hinderance to their being, giving off the appearance of too confident or too flashy whatever the issue this person may be seen as someone to not take seriously. To another no make up may let them hide like blending into the wallpaper and they don’t get to share their gifts or they simply get ignored.

Vinita asks the question : What hurts your progress in life? Our attitudes and beliefs held since childhood really do have to have their stinky little fingers pried from the steering wheel of life. I use to be scared to death to tell the truth in an emotional situation. One childhood experience caused me to be afraid to speak the truth when some one was emotionally charged. I was always in fear that if I told the truth it would come right back and smack me in the face. I would be wrong no matter what. This belief caused me to hide and give over my self-respect and integrity for years. I simple was afraid to stand up for myself and speak MY TRUTH….I have learned that what I KNOW is all I KNOW and that TRUTH is the only way to go!! ~ until I KNOW different. These things that are hanging on us keep us STUCK…in the Muck of FEARing to be real…with others and God…and ourself.

Vinita goes on to talk about hanging around people who are not good for you…do you know who those people are in your life?? OH I KNOW we are Christians we aren’t suppose to judge or be UNLOVING!! RIGHT??!! We take it for granted that God gave us DISCERNMENT. We know when someone is not right for us, for where we are, for were they are….WE CANT FIX PEOPLE! God can!! We will help no one if we can not control ourselves around certain people. You know what I am talking about — the person who makes you feel like you are wrong about everything and so you agree with them (even if it is just a tiny bit with your silence)…or the person who you just can’t stay out of the gossip corner with…or the person who comes around and they lay all this garbage in your mind and you always feel terrible and drained  after they leave…or the person who disrespects your time and you waste a whole week cause they think they live at your house. DONT FEEL GUILTY and tell yourself that you aren’t good enough, strong enough, or loving enough Christian…repent and stand with your DISCERNMENT of these things. Give yourself permission to respect yourself. YOU are one person you can DO SOMETHING about –so DO IT! You KNOW in your KNOWER if someone is NOT FOR YOU!! If they are dragging your down you cant help or do them good and they aren’t doing you good…they need the person who can help them up and so do you.

Taking inventory of the things that harm us and help us is a good thing to do …novel idea anyway…so I will give it a whirl —

Things that harm me :

My ability to blame others for my attitude problem, My need to have things in my kitchen right and so if it is not I get pissy, My ability to whisk myself away when I am hurt causing me to ignore issues and prolonging the situation. My need to deal with it NOW while not allowing others to process their way ( wow those two are opposites )  So naturally next should be my ability to swing from one extreme to the other making me feel Bi-polar.

Things that are helpful:

Being willing to see the reality of the situation in front of me no matter how painful or upsetting, Being willing to speak the truth that is in me so that I do not stuff and smile and turn into a volcano, Being kind to myself within my mind and heart, Resting when my body asks me too instead of pushing myself.

Can you make your own list? Do you know what is good for you and what is not…and who is not?

Have a great THURSDAY!! Blessings

Starla

Advertisements

BREAK TIME!

I am taking a break from the normal posting routine … Labor day I took off so I get I am having a blog-cation for the week. LOL!!

Yes that means No Thursday thougths book Im reading….have you read the others..check them out:0) — Thursday Thoughts: Days of Deepening Friendship

Seems like when you take a break from a routine you start another in other places..ever notice that???

Maybe that is the concentration center of the brain only able to change one thing at a time…

MULTI-TASKING!!!  is it even really possible or are we just spreading ourselves thin and not being fully in the MOMENT!! –good question??!!

Ok so since I had that spark of thought here are some quotes for todays thinking …routines, living in the moment, multitasking…

The past is a guidepost, not a hitching post.  ~L. Thomas Holdcroft

“Multi-tasking – Screwing everything up simultaneously.” ~unknown

 “A man practices the art of adventure when he breaks the chain of routine and renews his life through reading new books, traveling to new places, making new friends, taking up new hobbies and adopting new viewpoints”
~ Wilfred Peterson
  “Life is all memory, except for the one present moment that goes by you so quickly you hardly catch it going”
 Tennessee Williams
 “We decide to multitask instead of experience.”
 Michael Rosen

Any thoughts ??!! :0)

Have a blessed day and dont forget to rest once in a while..take a break…even if for 10 mins. Take a half hour nap or just close your eyes.

Do one thing at a time and live in the moment even if for an hour!! Its good for ya!

Be nice to yourself :0)

Starla

Getting Honest and Having Courage!

 
 

Thursday (Book I'm Reading) THOUGHTS

 
Reading: Days of Deepening Friendship by Vinita Hampton Wright
 Her site and to buy this book : http://deepeningfriendship.loyolapress.com/
  
Chapter 17: Are you ready to be honest?
 
Just the title of this chapter makes you cringe a little. Just the fact that it asks that question makes us question if we are…we may say we are…but are we, really ready? Each of us has to make that decision…we can say it….but only we know within if we ARE or we AREN’T! Consider….
 
Vinita begins this chapter with telling us about John the Baptist and His call to the people for repentance…from the whole Judean countryside…all the people of Jerusalem came to hear ( WOW…it said ALL THE PEOPLE came to hear) and what did they hear, Vinita says—-“John’s no-nonsense message woke them up to their spiritual need.” Isn’t that what we need is to WAKE UP!!
 
NO-NONSENSE …in a world that sugar coats, band aid patches, and skews the truth…what we really need is no-nonsense =TRUTH.  Truth makes sense. We don’t have to wrack our brains about it. IT JUST IS!!! Truth sets us Free…
 
Excerpt: When your soul is sending you signals that something is wrong but even good friends tell you not to worry so much and to give yourself a break, you will understand that something bigger is at stake. Spiritual awareness brings with it choices that sometimes only you will know about – those interior decisions that truly shape who you are.
 
What are you being called to do, to change, to let go of, to surrender…….
 
She goes on to write about how the WHOLE of society is BENT toward UNTRUTH.
 
The Doc says ~ take a pill so you don’t feel that way. Our Mind says ~ Tell them everything’s fine so you don’t have to deal with the gravity of the situation right now. Your Feelings says ~ Don’t ask direct questions its offensive. Your Ego says ~ Skate over wrongdoing, better yet cover it up. The people say ~ Its ok, its not that bad.
 
These are the crazy things people do and hear in this world. WE as GOD’S PEOPLE have to be careful that we are not CHOKING on that kind of LOGIC. (NONSENSE)
 
Excerpt: What does it cost you to tell the truth? Does your marriage limp along while both of you keep on doing the same old things in the same ineffective ways? If you told the truth, there would probably be fights and tears and horrible pain – but then at least you could begin to deal with the problems. Are you profoundly unhappy? And have you explored the possible causes of that unhappiness? If you learned what was wrong, then you’d need to act, wouldn’t you?
 
OHHHHHHHHHHHHH we are all BUSTED!!
 
While I know there are those of us who would rather have truth and let it grate our flesh and bleed than to be without it…however there are also those of us who are scared to death of truth. TRUTH requires us to DEAL WITH IT!!! Whatever IT is!!! It is sad to say but our human nature is just BENT toward COMFORTABLE SELFISHNESS!!! It is almost like we would rather lie, grin and fake it, manipulate or just plain take it …before we would just say PLAINLY what the PROBLEM is…what the TRUTH is…WHAT the ISSUE is!!! It takes great effort and much prayer and a strict regiment of habit to do RIGHT, live RIGHT, be RIGHT and let TRUTH be TRUTH and let GOD sort it out.  Well isn’t that the issue. We do all that stuff for CONTROL purposes…come on!!.. we are getting HONEST right??!! 
 
Vinita goes on to say that they had flocked to John the Baptist because He said : “You’re not ok, not at all. It’s time to change your life. Turn around and go the right direction, Face the truth – and you will know God’s mercy and forgiveness”
 
Facing the TRUTH is the problem we fight against these days and what we need most!! I would venture to say that most of us live in repressed, suppressed emotional hell holes inside our bodies and until we will …Heck until I was most steadfast on having truth –nothing changed!! NOTHING!
 
Its not like you have to all the sudden go over board and deal face to face with every issue you have at once we cant take that kind of pressure….ask GOD to show you where to start and be willing to just start following His lead to freedom. Maybe we have to start with our anger issues, our ability to be Melodramatic, or maybe its our pride or our critical attitude or gossiping tongue….He will tell you where to start and most likely you already know He has already said and you ignored Him! We don’t like to be uncomfortable or wrong or hurt or in pain do we??? Are we willing to be uncomfortable for a little while for FREEDOM! For PEACE Within!!
 
Except: When it comes to spiritual progress, the bad news usually comes first. One day you step out the door and run right into the consequences of your unwise choices and your entangled heart….God is already here, and you are already so completely loved that all of this mess will be just a little blip compared to what love can accomplish.
 
GOD is already HERE!! He knows what TRUTH we hide from and doesn’t condemn us for being weak. He offers His help. In our weakness He is STRONG. He knows how to get us through. TAKE COURAGE!!!
 
Acts 27:22
But now I urge you to keep up your courage, because not one of you will be lost; only the ship will be destroyed.
 
Whatever SHIP of NON-SENSE your Riding don’t worry, God can take care of you!! ONLY the SHIP will be destroyed. :0)
 
Better Yet JUMP OFF and WALK ON WATER!!!
 
Thanks for Listening
Starla

Like This!

The Resistance Within

Thursday (Book I'm Reading) THOUGHTS

Reading: Days of Deepening Friendship by Vinita Hampton Wright 

Her site and to buy this book : http://deepeningfriendship.loyolapress.com/
PART 4 : RISISTANCE
If we were designed for friendship with God, then why is it such a struggle to develop that friendship? …..We resist God. We avoid true contact with the Divine, and we do so for many reasons.
 
Chapter 16: What is holding you back?
 
Vinita delves into a DEEP WELL that we as humans would just soon rather cover over as if it is not there. SIN, WEAKNESS, SHORT COMINGS!! We don’t like to think about our Misbehavings….we like excuses!!!
 
People will always give reasons for their misbehaviors….We regularly do what we know we shouldnt do, we consistently do not live up to our own plans or proceed in the way we envision ourselves living and acting. We repeatedly set our feet upon a good path, only to resist our own steps and cause all sorts of messes. At the heart of our resistance is ego in its many forms.
 
OK!!! It is wild when God puts together many things for your learning and understanding. In another book I am reading it asked a question about CHOAS and the enjoyment one gets from it. A look from the ego’s view is what I took and I wrote a poem called EGO TRIP.  It is so true that the EGO gets in the way…and SELFISHNESS is the game.  Whether we want CONTROL, To be NEEDED, to be APPRECIATED, feel we are ENTITLED, have SIGNIFICANCE, what ever it is….WE  think that we ARE NUMBER ONE!!! and no one better say any different. Problem with that is we all are living our own lives and people aren’t going to GIVE IN TO YOU all the time so you can be HAPPY!! ~~MISS QUEEN BEE OF THE UNIVERSE!! ( that’s for me)
 
 The point is we have : This drive to be god rather than to BE in relationship with GOD is at the heart of all the sins we might care to name. The sad irony is this: all of our negative qualities arise out of our lack of relationship with God.
 
Being in contact with God will cause you to see the truth about ourselves…the stuff we tend to hide from…telling ourselves we are ALL GOOD on…Vinita called them POOR SUBSTITUTES!!
 
Lust developes when we are unable to engage joyfully in the physical, sensual life we already have. Envy appears when, rather than accept who we are, we try to be somebody else. Greed grows when we refuse to develop gratitude for what we have and the generosity to share it. Hatred grows when we don’t learn how to focus on life’s beauty and potential for goodness. For every negative trait that nurtured regularly, becomes a habit called sin, there is the trait we were meant to develop all along.
 
The traits that we are to nurture Vinita says are the FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT (another one I wrote on this week  …WOW WOW God is sooo good at teaching if we just listen) on Monday Motto : BE NICE 
 
Are we willing to dig into those EGO places and see OUR ego actions…or are we MUCH better at seeing other Peoples EGO issues ….
 
This week I see Ego issue : CONTROL FREAK!! I am a fairly orderly person…DONT MESS WITH MY ORDER, TIMELINESS is a MUST and BTW Windows UP when on the highway….My mom is here to visit and being who she is….honesty in the kindest way comes out…here is some example:
 
We had the windows down and enjoying the air I go to get on the highway I roll them all up and she quickly gets her arm out of the window…getting off the highway I open all the windows…chuckling I say ” you like how I roll all the windows up when getting on the highway” she said NO…i liked my window down..Control Freak !! I had to laugh…but she was right…..NOT..yessheis…grrrrrrrrrrr!
  
 
I am MAD at the stupid drivers in the parking lot, highway, in town, out-of-town, all over town ….she says: STOP IT GEEZ I AM GOING TO STRAP A BLOOD PRESSURE MONITOR ON YOU SO YOU CAN SEE WHAT YOU ARE DOING TO YOURSELF…your so bothered by the little annoyances you can’t see the flowers blooming on the side of the road…KNoCK iT Off!!!!
 
So I have some LOVE, Kindness and SELF control to work on I think …it may just be the whole list!!!
 
Pray for me GOD is TALKING and I dont wanna lose this lesson!!! 
 
 
Thanks for listening
Starla

Like This!